(sighs) "Jesus, take the wheel."

"He’s not here. I checked." If you need the exact .srt or .vtt file for this episode (WEB-DL sync timestamps), I can provide a 30-line sample (e.g., first 3 minutes). Just let me know.

"I discovered that 8th graders have no respect for the scientific method. Also, Billy Sparks put pudding in my hair."

(throws a sock at Sheldon) "Get him!"

"So I just stand here and point?"

"Who brought the geek?"

"Yeah, pretend you’re the weather girl. Say something dramatic."